An American Ladyboy in Thailand
I am (or was) what you would call a lady boy.
Born in the United States as a male, I never was happy in that role.
At 38 after contemplating suicide, I came to the determination that
unless I changed my physical appearance to match my mental sex, I did not want
to live any more. No easy task mind
you, I spent the first 38 years of my life attempting desperately to live and
appear in a male role. There are a
thousand stories like mine so I’ll skip all the gory details.
The point is, at 46 I found myself in Chonburi, Thailand having
corrective surgery (Sex Reassignment Surgery – SRS).
On April 19th of 2002 the Surgery was completed, and after a
week of recovery in the hospital I was relocated to the Royal Plaza Hotel in
Pattaya. During the following week
I started forcing myself to walk around and explore.
As you can imagine I was pretty sore, and was supposed to stay in the
hotel, but I am not one to lie around in bed or in a room all day. This is where my real story begins.
experiences in Thailand immediately revealed a complete difference in attitude
of the Thai people, from the people in America.
In the United States when you smile at someone they immediately become
suspicious of you, and some get down right irate that you are showing them any
attention at all. And as you can imagine, if a person like me does it, I am
just as apt to have stones thrown at me, as to get a return smile.
From my arrival at the Airport in Bangkok, until my departure on May 16th
of 2002 I was made to feel like Marilyn Monroe.
Perfect strangers, both women and men were constantly smiling, and trying
to get my attention. In Pattaya,
men and men, and women and women, walked hand in hand without a thought.
I was constantly being told how beautiful I am by perfect strangers, and
actually treated like a human being. One of the first things I did there
was to stop in for a foot massage. I met some of the most wonderful people
there, especially one lady friend, and within 2 weeks I had accumulated 15 or
more local friends, as well as one special girlfriend. I am very out going, and
every day I met wonderful women and men in Thailand... Not Bar Girls/Boys, I
never once visited a "go-go” bar in Thailand. The girl I met there
is not one of the knock down gorgeous Thai Ladies, but I was not after that. I
was not after finding a relationship of any sort, but she was beautiful all the
same, and even with the language barrier her heart was wonderfully open, honest,
and apparent. I have met her mom and dad, and they all seem perfectly accepting
of their Daughter and me... (She's 37) She is a self confessed Lesbian.
She has dark skin, and considers herself ugly, which I just can't understand,
but I guess it's a class/segregation kind of thing. I already care allot
for her. There is nothing here in America for me. I have no family,
and no reason to stay. A tarot reader at a temple I visited, told me that I
would return in 6 months and start an import export business, and would be very
successful. I had told no one of my desire to stay at that time... So
although I don't know if I believe all that stuff, (I know nothing about
import/export), it's still nice to hear that it's "in the cards"…
laugh. When I left, 5 friends I had made in Pattaya drove with me to the
Airport, and waited 4 hours with me for my midnight flight.
When I left the US, not one of my friends offered to go with me, and when
I returned, no one met me.
I have had
e-mail conversations with others that have stayed in Pattaya telling my how
horrible it was. What a filthy
city, everyone with their hand out, unbearable traffic, heat, and many other
complaints. I guess it all depends
on your attitude. I have
learned a small vocabulary of about 20 words, and have made myself a promise to
learn to read/write, and speak Thai. I have ordered some courses, and hope
to return around Christmas time. For such reasons as above I would love to
live there. I am now scrambling,
trying to figure out a way to return. They
say a picture is worth a million words, well then if you visit my website at http://xanth.us
you will see why I have fallen in love with Thailand. Your mileage may vary! ;)